PEPE TIME #69

I have a friend named Pepe. He's pretty funny and I like to keep a log of all the funny things he says and does. Enjoy.

 

Submitted by The Hater

THEY STAY WITH THE TRUCK

You might recall, a couple summers ago, Pepe was in the market for a new truck. Eventually, he ended up buying a brand new truck but almost immediately, something was wrong…

Pepe: dude, this fucking truck, as soon as I drove it off the lot, I started hearing a clunk coming from the rear end, brand new fucking truck, special ordered! 

Being the masterful negotiator that Pepe is, he brought the truck back to those “motherfuckers” and demanded that they give him his money back. Not fix the truck. Full refund. Eventually, Pepe ended up returning the truck but took a bit of a hit because he was unable to get back the old truck he had traded in. So now, he needed a new ride.

Pepe: hey, you still trying to sell your truck? 

Hater: well, not really trying but I guess I’d sell it. 

Pepe: how much you want for it? 

Hater: I’d probably let it go for $14k now. 

Pepe: would you take $11k? 

Hater: nah, its worth it more for me to keep, I’d have to go get a new truck if I sold this one. 

Pepe: ok, I’ll give you $14k for it. 


So, that weekend, Pepe and Nator rode down to pick up the truck…

Pepe: hey, you got some tie-downs I can borrow for the bikes? You can get them the next time you come up.

Hater: yeah, sure, no problem. 

A couple weeks later, I happened to be in the neighborhood, but someone was having a bad day…

Hater: hey, I’m right down the street. Can I get those straps? 

Pepe: I’ll meet you at the shop in 10 minutes 

[half hour later]

Pepe: here’s your straps 

Hater: cool, thanks, I need these for next week to…hey, where are the other two? 

Pepe: what? 

Hater: the other two straps, there were four

Pepe: oh yeah, those other two? yeah, THEY STAY WITH THE TRUCK! 

Hater: …what? Are you actually stealing two tie down straps from me?  

Pepe: I said, THEY STAY WITH THE TRUCK!