I've been receiving some funny daily updates from my good pals in Brazil that have only been reinforcing Chael's observations that Brazilians can be somewhat---um---unrefined. My good friend Ed Soares manages, among others, Rodrigo Nogueira aka Big Nog, who's fighting today at UFC 134. These stories are best told directly from Ed himself, but I'll try and repeat today's conversation as best as I can.
Big Nog and The Small Banner
Me: So, how's everything going?
Ed: I'm scared to fucking death June....this cab driver is speeding through Rio traffic like he's in Formula fucking One!
Me: Oh yeah? Hahaha, actually that sounds like fun. How are you doing? You sound pretty stressed."
Ed: I'm so stressed....
Ed: I swear, fighters can do the dumbest shit sometimes.
Me: What happened?
Ed: Well at the last minute Nog decides he wants all these extra sponsors on his banner. So his brother [Little Nog] decides to make the new banner himself.
[Note: He's referring to the banner that goes over the cage at the beginning of the fight, with all the sponsor logos on it. Tricky to make properly if you don't know what you're doing]
Ed continues: I told him it's really late to get it done, but I offered to do the mock-up of it if he really wanted it. He said he'd take care of it himself.
Me: Yeah? So how'd it turn out?
Ed: When the banner was done, I went to go check it out. Guess what...Nog didn't understand the dimensions I gave him for the banner---mixed up centimeters with feet and inches, because the fucking thing is about the size of a fucking placemat! No one's gonna be able to see shit! And he forgot to put one of the sponsors on it!
Me: Well at least it'll only take one guy to hold the placemat over the cage.
So when you're watching UFC 134, look out for Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira's placemat banner...unless they manage to replace it before tomorrow!
More shenanigans with Nogueira....
I'm Not Wearing Black Shorts
For some reason, Rodrigo Nogueira had a SERIOUS aversion to wearing black shorts... we're still not sure why.
Last Week's Conversation:
Big Nog: I'm NOT wearing black shorts for this fight!!
Ed: That's fine, you just can't wear white because that's what Brendan Schaub is wearing. So just choose a color that contrasts with white.
Big Nog: I don't care what color I wear. I'm just NOT wearing black.
(Again, we have no clue what why he was so passionately opposed to wearing black.)
Ed: So let's see your shorts Rodrigo. They're not white, right? Remember what I said.....
Big Nog: (proudly holds up the shorts that he picked): No, they're not white.
Ed: WHAT THE FUCK! Those are light gray! Are you fucking kidding me? LIGHT GRAY?! That's the same thing as WHITE on camera!!
Big Nog: Light gray is NOT the same thing as white.
Well, according to the UFC, light gray IS the same thing as white and the color was not approved. How's this: They had to cut off all of the embroidered sponsor logos (with the original "light gray" shorts material attached to it underneath, LOL) and hand-sew them onto new shorts insisted upon by the UFC....the color of those shorts? Black.
*My friend has since begun to consider making the "transition" away from working with Brazilian fighters.*
More updates to come!
[Big mahaloz to June!!!]